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So many single people I know use online dating apps.

It seems like a good way to meet people. We use the Internet for everything else: ordering pizza, booking vacations, paying bills. 

I’d veer away from the more popular dating apps to ones for people over 50. That way, at 54, I’d be among the hot young things.

First up, I’d need a profile, which sounded easy enough.

“Must love tutus,” I began. Then I was stuck.

So I turned to the Internet (of course).

“Your profile should start out by describing your most prominent and positive character traits. Are you funny? Outgoing? Creative? Loyal? Affectionate? Intellectually curious?”

Oh, sure. I’m all those things.

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Be interesting. The people in the examples were yoga masters, marathon runners, world travelers and mountain climbers. (Um, no.)

Tell the truth. (Chubby middle-aged woman, slightly anxious and easily distracted.)

List your passions. (Writing, tap dancing, re-reading “Harry Potter,” my kid.)

Be up-front about what you want. Yikes. I’m not sure I know. I don’t care if he’s bald (Captain Jean Luc Picard is my secret boyfriend, secret because he doesn’t know) or overweight if he’s healthy, compassionate and funny. He must read.

Now for pictures: a head shot, full body shot and mid-activity, like running or hiking.

I would want a body shot that makes me look heavier than I am, so when we meet, he’ll think, oh, she’s thinner than I expected.

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My action shots would be wine tasting, or tap dancing in an inflatable dinosaur costume. (That’s interesting, though hardly sexy unless he’s into that kind of thing.)

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Friends in Dance tap dance wearing inflatable dinosaur costumes. That’s Karina Bland on the right.
Karina Bland, The Republic | azcentral.com

“Why is everyone hiking in their pictures?” I asked my college-age son.

“Don’t put in a hiking picture, or you’ll actually have to do it,” Sawyer said.

Maybe one of me in a tutu.

“You might as well get it out there in the open,” Sawyer said.

I started again. “Must love tutus…”

For more Karina Bland, subscribe to her newsletter. Reach Bland at karina.bland@arizonarepublic.com. Follow her on Facebook and Twitter @KarinaBland.

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